Abstract of No Regrets?: How to Reach People with Healing Resources after an Abortion Decision (2023)
Purpose
This study explores the psychological dynamics involved in women’s decisions about seeking healing after an abortion. It has three primary objectives: 1) to understand grief patterns after an abortion (when, where, and how women experience regret), 2) to discover the most effective messaging approaches to encourage women who suffer grief after abortion to seek healing, and 3) to identify common characteristics of the ideal abortion healing center or program.
Project Design
Vitae Foundation uses Emotional Research to investigate decisions related to abortion. This particular type of research involves small sample sizes (to explore the emotional similarities between people in the target audience) and long-form interviews using visualization, repetition, and relaxation to uncover the emotional needs and barriers of respondents.
This study was designed in collaboration with the Office of Marriage and Family Life in the Catholic Diocese of Arlington, Virginia. Participants included 27 women who had at least one chemical abortion and 16 women who had at least one surgical abortion (43 total participants). These women were between the ages of 22 and 57 and were of varied racial backgrounds. Interviews took place in four cities: Phoenix, AZ, Dallas, TX, Chicago, IL, and Arlington, VA.
The interview group was comprised of women who had some measure of regret regarding their decision to abort. Participants were selected based on a telephone screening survey which asked respondents to share their levels of sadness and grief related to past abortions.
Findings
- First objective: To understand grief patterns after an abortion (when, where, and how women experience regret).The most common emotions women experience after abortion are sadness and guilt. Loneliness, grief, disappointment, and (unsuccessful) efforts to try to forget the abortion are also common. Rape victims experienced these emotions in similar ways/levels.To deal with these emotions and carry on in daily life the defense mechanisms of justification, rationalization, compartmentalization, and minimization are often employed. Justification: the abortion was for “good” reasons: to protect children already born or even future children who will be born at the “right” time. Rationalization: the abortion was neither good nor bad but necessary due to the presence of one or more difficulties/complications: too young, bad relationship, financial issues, health problems, lack of support. Minimalization: the abortion was just one of many difficulties in life and should not be dwelt upon overmuch. Compartmentalization: (the most common of the four defense mechanisms in this particular study) the abortion is something in the past that is hidden, not talked about, and “boxed up”, and hopefully not to be thought of (although this is very rarely possible)Younger women often cite a desire to avoid disappointing their parents and/or avoiding the personal or family shame of being unexpectedly pregnant as a primary reason they chose abortion. For these women, fear is the most common emotional response upon seeing a positive pregnancy test. Shame follows. Both emotions cause many underage girls to hide the pregnancy from their parents and promote an urgency for abortion. Tragically, some admit that they would have likely had support from their parents but still chose abortion.
The majority of women talk about the idea of regret. There is a similar depth and breadth of women who say they regret their abortions and those who say they do not. Many literally say “I regret my abortion” or indicate regret by saying they would have made a different decision, wouldn’t do it again, wish they hadn’t done it or admit regret but felt they had no choice at the time. These tend to be the same women that say their abortion is impossible to forget, has stayed with them forever and still hurts after 20, 30, 40 years. Oppositely, there are also many who literally say “I do not regret my abortion” or mention they have no sadness over it and suggest they would have missed out on future life experiences or opportunities if they had not chosen abortion. Similarly, some women question their abortion decision, some believe they made the best decision at the time and some simply tell themselves they can’t change the decision now and therefore there is no reason to dwell on it.
Women who have had abortions often visualize the possible life they would have had if the child would have been born and many talk about missing the aborted child. This is accompanied by a search for forgiveness (from themselves, God, others, and the aborted child) as they acknowledge that abortion represents the killing of a human being. Despite this widespread acknowledgment, abortion as a woman’s choice, as in previous studies, remains a consistent mantra, with the majority of women stating that the man involved has no say in the decision.
- Second objective: To discover the most effective messaging approaches to encourage women who suffer grief after abortion to seek healing.Women can be reached more effectively with messages that contain the following words or phrases (in descending order of prevalence): Nonjudgmental, comfort, removing loneliness, welcoming, inviting, moving forward, remaining positive, finding life on the other side of pain, and empowerment.Women also describe the messaging approaches that would make it more likely they would respond positively toward an invitation to seek healing for abortion. They include possibly offering closed social media groups to join as an initial step, requiring less commitment and an opportunity to simply look into the idea of healing. Also on social media, they suggest TikTok or Instagram videos about what abortion healing (or a healing ministry/program) might look like: what it entails, the goal, and the benefits. The other digital messaging approach they’d welcome would be pop up ads (“abortion healing”, “abortion help”, “healing from abortion” connected to searches for other women’s health topics, especially related to mental health or women’s health search terms.Women also suggested an abortion healing listing on health insurance apps (like UnitedHealthcare). Abortion healing ministries could be listed as a subcategory under mental health (along with therapists, psychiatrists, psychologists, adolescent counseling, etc.)
Women suggest the videos on social media could be developed into commercials for streaming TV services. They believe that the ads should show women of all different shape, size, color, and be filled with peace, hope, acceptance, and love.
Many women would respond best (or only) to a message about abortion healing through an invitation from a close friend or family member who has gone through a healing program and would recommend it. This could be done through systematically sending out women who have found benefit from their abortion healing experiences to their communities.
Women say that abortion healing advertisements need to be increased in the following places: gynecology offices or other doctors’ offices, church bulletins and newsletters, billboards and even in the waiting room or “after abortion care”/recovery instructions pages at abortion facilities (many women talk about the immediate guilt and need for prompt counseling after the abortion).
Finally, weaving natural elements into marketing materials is important (see comments below regarding the ideal abortion healing center) and can be done subtly or directly but should be incorporated in some way to capture the attention and interest of women hurting from abortion.
A key messaging/marketing question is why most post-abortive women do not seek out healing ministries. There are two important answers: 1. They don’t know they exist. More data on this theme is needed but interviewees’ responses about the “ideal healing center” (in below section) and their evaluation of the abortion healing resources presented to them at the end of their interviews demonstrate this is true. 2. Their defense mechanisms are too strong/they don’t think they are in need of healing. Women who employ rationalization and justification will be harder to reach than those who employ minimization and, especially, compartmentalization. This is not necessarily a bad thing because compartmentalization was the most prevalent defense mechanism exhibited by women in this particular study. Messaging/marketing should be designed to address this particular defense mechanism.
- Third objective: To identify common characteristics of the ideal abortion healing center or program.Despite often not knowing they exist, women describe their ideal healing programs in ways that are similar to programs such as Rachel’s Vineyard, Project Rachel, Deeper Still, and other abortion healing ministries.Women imagine finding healing surrounded by empathetic people with whom they can identify. Respondents imagine an environment which offers them a safe place to stop hiding their abortion trauma from the world around them and themselves. They want to know that others will accept them. They don’t want to be alone or feel like the only one who has ever gone through this experience. Though respondents imagine a place where they can have solitude at times, community is also an integral part of their ideal healing setting. Respondents are looking for guidance from someone who has walked their path. Women find it important to be able to talk to women who have gone through abortion and found healing, who do not judge them, and can facilitate healing for them as well. The opportunity to participate in relaxing, rejuvenating, peaceful activities such as gardening, journaling, walking, stretching, or meditating is desirable.Most women describe their ideal healing center or program as having natural elements, including: greenery (plants and flowers) and water (waterfalls, streams, seacoast, beach, and waves). They are resort-like places that are bright and provide calming music/sounds and smells. They hope for a place that feels comfortable and inviting, more like home than a facility or institution.
Overall, church or religious involvement is desirable for most. Many say that religious involvement depends upon the individual (attendee’s) choice/desire and that a spiritual aspect should be included but not geared toward one religion.
Suggested names (or marketing terms) reveal the importance of healing, peace and acceptance:
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- Healing Heart, Healing Place, A Place of Healing, Strong-Capable-Healed, Healing Women
- Finding Wisdom, Finding Peace, At Peace, Safe Space, Safe Circle, Not Alone, Everyone’s Welcome, We’re Here for You, Here to Listen
- Women’s Health and Services, Women’s Choices, Women’s Retreat Center, Girl Code
- Support Group for Abortion Grief, Hope Without Grief
- Deep Breath, Just Breathe
- Divine Destiny, Gathering Tree, Truth, Fresh Start, Open Hands, Your Voice
- Fortitude, Rebuilding StrengthTo view the Major Themes for No Regrets?, click here.
- To obtain one of the following guides: or to cite Vitae’s research contact our Research Team by filling out the form below.
- the Pro-Woman Policy Guide
- the Pro-Woman Approach for Medical Professionals Guide
- the Pregnancy Center Guide
- the Pro-Woman Approach for Pastors Guidebook
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